Belated Mothers’ Day

Sunday marked a strange (and wonderful) transition time for me. There are changes afoot – a baby on the way. And even though I feel nauseated most of the time, the idea is still settling in that all of this rigamaroll is going to result in a new human being.

That is to say, I spent most of the day a little shocked when people wished me a Happy Mother’s Day.

And I tried to say something here all day, to express gratitude for my amazing mom, my grandma, the women I love… but for some reason, the words weren’t there. I’m deep down happy, but also a little scared to be joining those ranks.

More than that, I’m acutely aware that mother’s day can be a hard day for so many people. My heart is achey and thumpy for women who want to be mommies – for the men who are also moms – for children (of all ages) that missed their moms this weekend.

Because my own words are failing me, I’m leaning on a friend. Even though I don’t have a dance teacher, or education professors,  CheekyPinky‘s heartfelt words struck me as honest and true. They reminded me that I’m not joining ranks…I’m already in them.

So I’m sharing her words with you.

To my girl friends,

who have held me and loved me at my most unlovable,
some of whom are mothers themselves,
the kind of mothers I pray to God I might become someday;
to my girl friends who aren’t mothers,
but are sisters of my heart,
who keep me close
while my own sister is so far away.

To my education professors, to my pastor’s wife,
to the women in my church who take my breath away
with their faith and kindness;
to The Bloggess, to my dance teacher;
to all of the women who taught me that grace is better than anger
(even if I’m still Bad at That),
that it is Okay to be smart and funny and…

that God doesn’t just love women who are all doilies-and-teacups;
that it is Okay that I am not my mother’s Perfect Daughter.

Thank you.

I love you.

Happy Mother and Sisters’ Day.

A few things I’ve heard (or read, or seen) lately that I like

Chameleons never announce themselves! – a girl I met at a party

Laughing at these monsters beside us makes them so much less terrifying. – The Bloggess

I’m a clarinetist. I never need trumpets. – Lexi Bond

Don’t ask who’s influenced me. A lion is made up of the lambs he’s digested and I’ve been reading all my life. – Giorgos Seferis

Reading good books ruins you for enjoying bad books. – The Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Pie Society

In this case, I’m the monster beside The Bloggess

Does anyone know what kind of flower this is?

A moment to myself with a book and a pup this weekend.

non sequitur in 3 parts

I had some errands to run after work last night, so I stopped off at home and threw on my favorite (of late) t-shirt and some jeans. Aforementioned t-shirt is white with a line drawing of a french bulldog.

Wait, let me see if I can find it online.

Nah, can’t find it exactly, but here’s something that’s reasonably similar:

So half an hour later, I’m wandering around Bed Bath and Beyond in the bedding section and a guy who was getting ready to do some restocking wheeled a 15 foot ladder by me and yelled out,

“HEY! I used to have one of those dogs! He died though.”

He stopped the ladder and peeked around the corner he’d just passed to make sure I’d heard him and to await a response.

“Oh! I’m so sorry!”

“It’s ok.”

And then he wandered away again. After a moment or two, I continued perusing the pillows and duvet covers. I made it all the way over to comforters and bedspreads when the guy came sprinting back over to me just to say,

“We never let him inside the house!”

“Oh that’s…um, why?”

“He was a nervous farter.”

We both enjoyed a good belly laugh and snortle or two, and then went our own ways. I like laughing with strangers.

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I find it interesting how often the following phrases are used in social media.

1.) ‘Nuff said. The irony is often lost on the poster themselves. They seem not to realize that “enough” is literally not being said.

2.) Dear______ , Love _______.  I’m guilty of using this one, and I do think it’s occasionally clever. Though, rarely when I use it.

3.) Nothing says ______ like ________.  Example: “Nothing says Christmas like cinnamon raisin cookies!” This truism is often only true for the individual making the statement. For instance, I hate cinnamon raisin cookies and they expressly do NOT say Christmas to me. Occasionally, this phrase could be used with irony, in which case “Nothing says Christmas like cinnamon raisin cookies!” would be funny and true.

4.) Gotta love ______.  Example: “Gotta love waking up to poop spewing out of your toilet at 5:30 in the morning!” Implied irony 98% of the time. Irony omitted only when used incorrectly.

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Could anyone else use a nap right now? Come ON Tuesday! For the love.

Living The Dream

Today, I have to finish going through every page of 148 student files totaling up how many hours they’ve each logged in their internships this semester. It’s all just adding and counting and tallying and data entry (read: no brain power involved.)

The game that’s getting me though the day is imagining I’m a victorian accountant a la The Offices of Ebeneezer Scrooge. I’m at a tall standing desk with a gas lamp on the wall and a well of ink that I have to keep dipping in to. The paper is parchment. There is a bucket of coal that is nearly empty in the corner.

A copious amount of tea is also helping to keep this illusion alive.